Money, relationships, and work. Those are the big ones for most of us. The big stressors. Some of us might add family to that list. 
For those of you experiencing a lot of job stress, we know that sometimes work and all the pressure and tension around it can feel overwhelming at times. Maybe you’ve denied just how bad it is for years, and you’re just now waking up to how much you need a change. Maybe the stress has crept up on you slowly, but all of a sudden it feels like you’re about to blow up from the pressure. Maybe you’ve just started a new job, and are feeling overwhelmed by an uncomfortable amount of pressure that you weren’t expecting. Nima and I have both been there – trust us, you aren’t alone!
For example, let’s say you’re working in a high stakes, high pressure environment where everyday you’re challenged to perform at the highest level. Maybe you’re a cop or a stock trader or a high school teacher, or a nanny for 4 little monsters – we mean that in the sweetest way of course . You’ve been in the same position for years now. You don’t really know for sure the best way to deal with all of this work stress. Somehow you’ve muddled through, but it is starting to take its toll on you. You know that little by little your mental, emotional and physical well being is going downhill. You haven’t had a heart attack or anything yet thank God, but it’s something you worry about sometimes at night. You are beginning to sense that you’re starting to break down, like a car whose maintenance has been neglected for way too long. You’re running out of steam, and you’re starting to feel like this job that you used to love may be the end of you.
To keep things simple, let’s talk about 3 possible directions you could go from here:
Choice #1, you can keep on living the same way you have been up to now. Change isn’t easy and for now you’re just going to hope you’ll make it through somehow, and figure it all out sometime later. This choice might not look so attractive, and you might even get a sense of dread in the pit of your stomach when you consider this option. Remember that saying about the definition of insanity? The one about doing the same thing and expecting different results?
Choice #2, you can make a break for it. Just get out quick while you still can. The pressure inside you has built up over so long that this option sometimes feels like the best choice. Your professional reputation might suffer if you choose this option, or it might not. The main thing is that you need to get out now, so you’re just going to jump and figure out the landing later on!
Choice #3, learn how to deal with your stress right now, so you can let go of some of that tension you’ve been building up all these years. Feel better right now, start to get healthy again, and be in a more relaxed and clear headed place so you can make good decisions about what it is you really want to do in the future. From this place, you can make a graceful exit from your high stress job, or you can stay and start to shape your environment to better suit you. If you do decide to go, you have the the space to chart out where you want to land, what your future might look like. What your new job or business or passion might look like, and how best to get there from here.
The only danger in that 3rd choice that we see is that sometimes we try to use stress management as a kind of band-aid. Sometimes, and this is true for those high performing, type A types among us especially, we think that poorly managed stress is the only thing we need to look at in out lives. That if we can just learn how to let go of some our tension and calm down a bit with some stress management techniques, then we can keep driving ourselves at 200 miles per hour.
If we try to put that kind of a band-aid on ourselves, we usually find that, just like a real band-aid, it will only stick for so long. Eventually, you will still need to slow down – no matter how well you master the art of relaxation. Just like a car engine, our bodies are just not meant to rev at 100% all the time. For one thing, we all need periods of rest, time to relax, time to take it easy, time to heal from the daily stress of living. And when it comes time to get going again and to get some work done, our body-engines do much better if we can work and cruise along at 2 or 3000 RPM rather than revving constantly near the red line. It’s at this level of moderate stress that we can find our sweet spot and perform our best, without breaking down over the long run.